User talk:George Swan/Sandbox/Matthew Diaz: Difference between revisions

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Could we have a little more information in the lead paragraph explaining why Matthew Diaz is important, please?  I was able to figure out what the article was about only because I've been following your other contributions.  Even now, having read the article and done a quick internet search for this man's name, I'm confused about who he is and what he did. --[[User:Joe Quick|Joe Quick]] 17:01, 20 October 2007 (CDT)
Could we have a little more information in the lead paragraph explaining why Matthew Diaz is important, please?  I was able to figure out what the article was about only because I've been following your other contributions.  Even now, having read the article and done a quick internet search for this man's name, I'm confused about who he is and what he did. --[[User:Joe Quick|Joe Quick]] 17:01, 20 October 2007 (CDT)
::It just needs a summary of the main points at the beginning, where you give his name, rank and approximate age. Isn't there a record of his date of birth because of legal proceedings? --[[User:Martin Baldwin-Edwards|Martin Baldwin-Edwards]] 17:05, 20 October 2007 (CDT)

Revision as of 16:05, 20 October 2007

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NOTICE, please do not remove from top of page.
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My first draft here is based on my first draft on the wikipedia. Cheers! George Swan 16:13, 20 October 2007 (CDT)


Could we have a little more information in the lead paragraph explaining why Matthew Diaz is important, please? I was able to figure out what the article was about only because I've been following your other contributions. Even now, having read the article and done a quick internet search for this man's name, I'm confused about who he is and what he did. --Joe Quick 17:01, 20 October 2007 (CDT)

It just needs a summary of the main points at the beginning, where you give his name, rank and approximate age. Isn't there a record of his date of birth because of legal proceedings? --Martin Baldwin-Edwards 17:05, 20 October 2007 (CDT)